In the Silver Rules, found in the Vadan, there is the stern injunction, “Meet your shortcomings with a sword of self-respect.” The words are like a cold shower, waking us up from the fog of self indulgence. They remind us that we don’t actually like our shortcomings; if we are honest, we feel demeaned by them. And a sword cuts and doesn’t allow compromise. On the surface, then, the meaning of this bead of silver seems clear and straightforward: get your act together.

But this ‘rule’ was the subject of a recent, very interesting conversation that revealed an unexpected depth. How can we understand this, since shortcomings certainly are the product of the ego, but then self-respect also sounds like the ego at work. That leaves us with the picture of ego chopping at ego, which seems contradictory.

First of all, yes, it is true that the shortcomings we display are generated by our self-centred separation from the rest of the world. We may solemnly repeat the Invocation which asserts that there is only One Being, but we commonly think and act as if we are beings living apart, worlds unto ourselves. Perhaps we hope to discover unity someday, but in the meantime, we have our life to live. But the fruits of that division are all the usual bitter dust and grit: pride, selfishness, jealousy, envy, lack of consideration, criticism, and so on.

Therefore, the ‘ego’ is usually portrayed in popular spirituality as the source of all evil, the sly, sulphurous devil that we must constantly guard against in all our affairs. But then, who or what is it that moves Creation? That animates us and all that lives and moves and breathes? The Sufi says that there is the small self of the human being, and the real Self of the Divine. Our separate existence is only transitory, and so we have no right to say ‘I’; only the eternal Presence may make that claim.

If we look at the Silver Rule again, we can understand that the sword of self-respect should not represent obedience to a sort of middle class pride, keeping up appearances and worrying about what the neighbours will think, but a humble respect for the Divine Self that animates us and all. When we stand in humility and respect that Self, which incidentally is the origin of all human virtues, then our limited plans and schemes fall away and are forgotten, and the real Self lifts us toward Perfection.